We’ve all heard the clichés: Life is for the living.
Keep a stiff upper lip.
The show must go on.
If you’ve ever had to go to work while in the throes of grief over the loss of a loved one, you’ve tried to live out the meaning of those clichés.
If you are NBA Laker guard, Wayne Ellington, you live out those clichés in front of fans, frenemies and fellow competitors in a game clearly not for the weakened. Wayne Ellington lost his father, Wayne Sr., last November in a senseless murder. After a mere 10-day leave of absence, Wayne Ellington returned to the game. He didn’t just return to the game, he returned to deliver his personal best. This season with the Lakers he averaged 10 points a game while shooting 41.2% from the field and 37 percent from the 3-point range. At the end of this season, Ellington becomes an unrestricted free agent. He’s already been on five teams in six seasons.
If ever there were a time for personal best in Ellington’s pro career, it is now.
This is quite remarkable when you consider that although Ellington wasn’t present at the time of the murder, he replays the murder in his head “all the time.” He shares his heart wrenching thoughts: “It’s pretty graphic honestly. It’s pretty disturbing. It’s something that I try not to think about but it’s a pretty bad image. I don’t even want to talk about what I see.”
And yet, he has been able to compartmentalize these thoughts during practice and game time. He has mastered the ability to set aside his sorrow in the short term and rise above. When the season ends and he is away from his all-consuming routine, he says he will have to think about it then. He will have to feel it. All of it. Who wouldn’t dread that? Season’s end has come sooner than expected for Ellington. As of this morning, it was announced that Wayne Ellington would be out for the rest of the season when an MRI revealed he has a separated shoulder suffered during a 113-92 loss to to the New Orleans Pelicans on Wednesday, April 1st. The timeline for facing his loss just moved up.
Lakers center, Ed Davis describes Ellington as always being able to check all his problems at the door when he comes to work.
That’s a superpower for someone who is grieving as he is, with those kinds of thoughts in his head.
What if you don’t possess that superpower and find yourself in a situation where you must, but are unable to, “check your problems at the door”? What if you need to quiet the chatter in your head when you play the game but cannot? Hypnosis can do that for you.
Hypnosis allows athletes and executives to be able to sharpen their focus for extended periods of time while working through a difficult situation. That is to say, you can temporarily mute the chatter and distraction at work or in competition for enhanced performance while you solve the problem.
It would seem that Wayne Ellington had impressively got compartmentalization down on his own. Maybe he was seeing a hypnotherapist! If he isn’t seeing one now, he should.
Through the power of hypnosis we would peacefully resolve the disturbing thoughts and images in his mind regarding his father’s death. These recurring thoughts and images sound awful, painful and exhausting. Without an intervention he will have literally trained his mind to replay them over and over again with increasing frequency until this gruesome state becomes his new normal.
So come on Wayne Ellington, get in my chair! Hypnosis is peaceful, restful and productive. Together we will lay to rest those thoughts and images. Of course we can’t bring your father back, but we can vividly reconnect you to your positive memories so that he lives on in your mind and in your spirit. Grief is hard. Murder makes it harder. You have coaches and trainers for your body and now that your season has come to an end and you will have to face your loss square on, you will need a coach for your mind. Call me.
About the author : Mona Jones is a Certified Hypnotherapist in Orange County, California who helps clients around the world heal, deal with grief and loss and to compartmentalize or mute distractions while improving focus. For more information visit the Contact Us page of www.monajoneshypnosis.com